The journey from BURN! to Birth

Five months ago, I. Was. Killing it. By that I mean: I was a fitness fiend. A day without some type of workout was all but unheard of; some days I might have even doubled down. Now, I should mention that I work in fitness – I’ve worked at gyms since I was 16, taught Pilates and group fitness for 9 years, and certified new instructors for 6. A large part of the last 15 years of my life has been spent inside of gyms, studios, and clinics… so I’m lucky that “getting to the gym” isn’t usually that difficult. Even still, I was especially driven in the last few years to really push myself: to reach for new goals (running half marathons when I HATE running), to be more aware of what I was putting in my mouth (a pumpkin spice latte has HOW many calories?!), to add to my list of “tricks” (Peacock pose. Look it up.).

To a certain extent, I believe I was not only competing with myself, but with that omnipresent, addictive beast: the Facebook Newsfeed. Yes, that’s right. When you work in fitness, and if you are friends with your colleagues, your newsfeed is a log of incredible feats of super-human strength. Well, ok, maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration. But there’s a lot of “I just crushed a 50 mile run!” and “Try this super amazing juice fast!” So, when you are eating an ice cream sundae in your sweats and checking Facebook, if you HAVEN’T worked out that day, you may feel a little…well, lazy.

Then, one week, things were completely different. Monday I set my alarm for my normal 5:15 am workout time… and slept right through it. Tuesday, I did the same. Wednesday came and I thought, ok, maybe afternoon hot yoga is a better option. And as I lay face down on my mat, dripping sweat, in a room heated to 97 degrees, I felt it coming… that moment when you KNOW you are about to puke…

That Saturday I bought a pregnancy test. And let me tell you, that little blue line did NOT need 3 minutes to process. It was there immediately. My husband and I had just decided to start trying that month… so we were both in a bit of disbelief. There’s no WAY it happened so quick! So I took the second test in the box. Same result. I even bought another brand of test, and still, the same result. I was pregnant.

There are very few things I’ve known with certainty in my life,  but knowing I wanted to be a mom was one of them. I have always wanted this, as far back as I can remember. Even as a toddler, I named my baby dolls after my newborn cousins, as a child I begged to go visit the newborn unit of the hospital, and as a teenager I spent my Friday nights babysitting. That’s probably why, in my head, I always thought getting pregnant would be nothing but rainbows and butterflies. But no one really tells you the not-so-shiny part, do they? The first trimester got underway, and though we were thrilled, I suddenly found myself feeling miserable, and freaking out.

Suddenly my workouts were much harder, if they existed at all.  I could barely find an ounce of energy. When I forced myself to work out and did my regular cardio, I started bleeding…. WHOA, that was scary (after visiting the doctor, I found out it was not the baby, thankfully). I felt so conflicted – I didn’t know what was safe or what was normal, when to push and when to back off. My doctor told me to do 15% less of what I was doing before… but even with that in mind, my body wasn’t having it.

So I did what every health and wellness geek does when she doesn’t have the answers. I started researching. As much as I could. And wow, was I disappointed. Everything I found seemed to be very generic, written for women who were not active before pregnancy. Most consumer articles approached pregnancy and exercise from an one-size-fits-all, overly-cautious standpoint; which makes sense, since it is a risky situation to write guidelines that apply to everyone when every woman- and every pregnancy- is so different. Even the scholarly articles – the very, very few that I found, were somewhat vague, and rarely discussed the woman who was fit and active before she was prego. Or, they addressed a broader subject than what I was seeking – like, does exercising while pregnant result in shorter labor times? But what I wanted to find was specific fitness information based in research: a what-to-expect-when-you’re-expecting for the fitness fiend who already had some basic knowledge. Of course I didn’t want to start anything new or push myself too hard. But, I had questions none of these articles seemed to answer. For example, what was it  about jumping rope that made my cervix bleed? Is it true that deep twisting is contraindicated even in the first trimester, and is it due to a risk of diastasis recti? Is a drop in testosterone levels the reason why my muscles feel soft all over, even though I’m still including resistance training? Is it normal that I have a little extra cushion-for-the-pushin’ even in my BACK?  These are the answers I was seeking.

I still continue to research, and would welcome any suggestions from any of you who may have answers. In the meantime, I decided to start this blog in an effort to share my own experiences, knowing that there are women out there like me who want to remain active and healthy during pregnancy, while making educated, smart decisions. Furthermore, I find it silly that women don’t talk about the not-so-good, the bad, and the sometimes ugly parts of being with child… sometimes, it’s laughable. And if we can all laugh about it together, then it will make it that much more enjoyable.

I hope you find something here that inspires you, motivates you, and makes you smile. I hope you join the conversation,  and tell your friends. And I hope that throughout your pregnancy, you remain Fit to Glow.

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